The Laursonian Institute

It’s 8:30, and I can barely keep my eyes open.  I didn’t get up particularly early or any such thing, but I guess it’s been sort of a long day.

I had my first section this morning at 9.  It both went well and sort of crap, which seems to be how section always goes.  The atmosphere was really great.  The kids asked a bunch of questions, some clarification, some curious, and I had good participation in all the questions I asked of them.  That’s the good.  The bad… my computer wouldn’t work with the projection system for some reason, so I couldn’t use all the web resouces I had prepared.  But we didn’t even end up getting that far, because we spent so long on the really basic (and reallllly boring) consonant chart.  It’s good if it was helpful, and it seemed to be so, but I definitely felt like I wasn’t quite on my game, and couldn’t entertain the kids like I wanted.  We’ll see if I can’t spice it up next week.  And hopefully I can think of some way to improve Friday’s section so they don’t get stuck with this same boring task!

Skipped over to the Center to get into my cogneuro class (late, since my section conflicts) which had a guest lecturer today.  I got there only about 35 minutes late, which was good, but the lecturer didn’t seem to know how long our class was.  We got out about 45 minutes early, which means I didn’t get much of the matieral at all!  It is, however, always a nice treat to get out early.  Walked home with Lewis (sans bike), recombobulated myself here, and then headed out to the Center again to meet with my fMRI partner from yesterday.  She was too busy to discuss data or anything, and our lab professor is in Hawaii, so there really wasn’t anything to do.  Thankfully the Center is right next to the gym, so it wasn’t out of the way to drop by.

Gym was good.  It’s ridiculous how easy it is to get my heart rate up to near max, so I always try and make sure I’m staying at a reasonable rate and not working too hard.  I’ve been trying to aim for something like the suggested 30-minutes of vigorous activity a day, and that’s pretty managable.  I’ve never worked out regularly before, but I’m really surprised how big of a difference it makes in my stress levels.  I was chuckling to myself in the lockroom today when I realized that I’m one of the lucky people there who achieves their goal every day.  Very easy when your goal is “do any exercise”, and not gaining strength or losing weight or learning to do stuff.  Whoohoo!  I’d like to think the regular de-stressing exercise has something to do with my lack of migraines so far this month… and I’m still major palipitation free since spring break too!

April 8th, 2009 | Tags: center, gym, section, stress, taing, tired | Category: life, school | Comments Off

Blurg.  Too tired to post, per usual.

It’s Tuesday.  It’s our first day back from San Diego.  The trip was wonderful, the train trip back home was fantastic, and I’m exhausted.   Tomorrow’s my first of my worst days – Wednesdays I teach section at 9 am, and then I have to jet myself over to the CMB for my CogNeuro class, which inconventiently starts at 9:30.  I’m really not looking forward to missing the first 45 or so minutes of class every week, but it’s only one day a week, and I’m trying not to stress about it.

I’ve been good about the stress level lately.  Went to the gym this morning and worked out for a while, which seems to leave me feeling more able to cope than days when I don’t work out.  I have no idea why that is, but I’ll take what I can get.  I also skipped my only class today (Ling 1 lecture) so I could get some sleep, cause 9 am was feeling way too early after getting in so late last night.  I also got my first trip to the Imaging Center to shadow an fMRI run-through.  It was neat, and useful, but not quite as exciting as I was anticipating.  Maybe I’m just tired.  I did get some good advice from the girl running the study, who also has worked in our lab for the last few years.

There’s a lot more I’ve missed out on blogging… but right now I’m just nervous and ready for bed so I can get through my big day (morning?) tomorrow.  I’m sure it’ll all work out fine – I’ve got a million things planned.  Fingers crossed.

April 7th, 2009 | Tags: family, fmri, lab, section, taing, tired, train, trip | Category: life, school | Comments Off

I should be going to bed already, since I have a 6 am train to catch.  I guess it’s another list?

• no section or office hours this morning = sleeping in!
• got myself some decent gym shoes
• had the first session of my last class.  it’s good!
• spent all night getting stuff ready for san diego trip

And now… to bed.

April 3rd, 2009 | Tags: class, list | Category: life, school | Comments Off

Super productive day, but I don’t feel much like being expository tonight.  Mostly because I’m pooped!  List form it is:

• Cogneuro class this morning – learned about EEGs.  Very neat!
• Met with lab professor to set up research plan for this quarter.  Starting a Monday reading group (to count as my “directed reading”) and a Wednesday hands-on training deal.  Professor wants me to be trained to analyze the raw fMRI data he has collectd but not processed yet.  Also intend on starting a new study (to be partially directed by my interests?) and gathering pilot data already this quarter!
• Spent a while at the gym doing generic cardio stuff (stairs, mostly) cause I think it helps destress me a bit.  Also tried an actual weight lifting device, and now my arms are sore in the strangest places!
• Made oatmeal cookies with orange-essenced cranberries and white chocolate chips.  They turned out pretty good, for a recipe I hadn’t tried before.  Should bake them a little less next time.
• Did a bunch of paper trolling (as in, reference chasing and google scholar browsing) for papers to start our reading group off with.  Too many choices already, but I found some really good background papers for myself at least.
• Traced the pattern for Lewis’ PJs onto sturdier tracing fabric, and cut out all the pieces.  It’s starting to look like I’m doing something with this!

That’s all from me tonight.  This week is going crazy slow!

April 1st, 2009 | Tags: baking, class, cookies, crafting, data, fmri, gym, meeting, muscles, research, sewing, study | Category: life, school | Comments Off

What a wonderful start to my first day of spring quarter. Had my cognitive neuroscience class this morning, and it went much better than I had been dreading.  I should have known it was going to be fun, but I was getting myself a bit worked up over the professor not emailing me bcak, and seeming sort of odd.  She is odd, but in a good way, and apologized for the email snafu, and seems completely unpreturbed that I’ll be missing 30-45 minutes of class every Wednesday.  Luckily only half those are not “real” class days, as we have some cancelled classes and student presentation days.  Anyway, good class, good group, and I’m really looking forward to it.  Oh, and we only have a 6 page paper to write!  That’s crazy short – undergrad short!

I had a really productive afternoon.  Went to Vacaville while Lewis was in class to check out possible work out clothes at Eddie Bauer.   Found not only work out clothes, but also really cute summer shirts to wear, and some other acoutrements.  I did spent twice as much as I thought I was going to (miscalculated a 30% off.. oops) but I’m in the middle of not stressing out about it, where I’m going to stay.  Clothes were bought.  They will serve me very well.  I’m feeling very good about my waredrobe, and that seems to cost some money, and I’m willing to spend that money while it appears we have a smidge to spare.  Oh, I also hit up JoAnn’s Fabrics to pick up the tracing paper I need to get going on a pair of jammies I’m trying to make Lewis.  Yay.

Only other major accomplishment today: the gym!  I went!  I attended a yoga class tonight, and it was really nice.  Lots of popping and cracking of my tired bones, and lots of working muscles I haven’t bothered with in ages.  The group was really welcoming, and non-intimidating, as I was hoping for.  Hour long class had me totally beat, and completely relaxed.  Spent a few minutes before class in the womens-only room as well checking out the machines, and it was lovely.  Very low-key, no one bothering anyone or making a fuss.  After these two major successes, I signed up for the gym for-really – a 6 month go.  Phew.  It was cheaper than it could have been (one month free and no sign-up fee and discounted to boot) but it was still quite a downpayment.  But I figure, if I go to yoga even twice a week, it’s only like four bucks a class.  And right now, I am way more than four buck relaxed and worked out.

March 30th, 2009 | Tags: class, clothes, crafts, gym, shopping, yoga | Category: life, school | Comments Off

Spring break is over, it is.  And I’m feeling pretty good about that.  I got everything I wanted to do done, which is really rather surprising for a relaxing vacation.  Garden was planted, much weeding and work accomplished, I decided on the gym to join, saw all my Ask friends (twice!), hung out a ton with Emily, baked goods, read books, got a new bookshelf moved in and filled, finished our taxes… amazing!  I’m feeling very relaxed, my palpitations have been minor in the last few days, and I’ve almost entirely gotten rid of the elephant-on-my-chest feeling.  I’m not feeling nervous about tomorrow, but rather looking forward to this week.  It’s my easy week, with no sections to teach, and I’m hoping for a pretty smooth quarter.

I’ve had a long thing about this stress and my life, and I think I’ve made some headway.  My mantra this quarter: “everything is optional”.  As in, I take on only the stress I take.  Everything in life besides basic function – food, home, pay – are entirely optional.  School is optional, thus classes are optional.  The gym is optional, biking is optional, blogging is optional.  Reading is optional, assignments are optional, excelling is optional, research is optional.  I choose to do these things, but they do not characterize my life.  They are choices I make every day, because I like to do these things, and because I choose to spend my life this way.  And there is nothing that says I must keep doing any of these things.   I think keeping this in mind will help me keep from stressing out.  I’m a lucky girl who gets to do what she wants to do nearly every day.

March 29th, 2009 | Tags: break, mantra, school, stress, success | Category: home, life | Comments Off

It’s another feeling-late night (though I know it’s only 11) and that means list time:

• saw a lovely phlebotomist, got labs done
• headed out to 3 Palms to check out plants
• hit up ace, picked up sharpened knives!
• planted procured flora
• almost planted dwarf lime tree…
• hung out with heather and kevin!  symposium, davis creamery, “the meaning of life”

Tomorrow… I’m going to mostly chill the heck out.  And go to a Bollywood movie with the KEs!

March 26th, 2009 | Tags: doctor, friends, gardening, list, movie, plants | Category: life | Comments Off

Too tired… can only list:

• drove to Oakland
• hung out in favorite local bookstore (FOPL!)
• had lunch at Rattos with favorite local work friends!
• had second lunch with Armand in Berkl!
• nerded around model train store
• read books and birdwatched on campus
• visited favorite Berkl coffee shop / classical music shop and adjacent bookstore
• drove back to Davis
• had chinese takeout with the Lawyers + Schmidts
• tried enquicken Lawyer computer (failed)

Tomorrows gonna be a big day.  I think it might be join-the-gym day.  And early morning blood sample day.  But it’s also hang out with Heather and Kevin day, and the big trip to the nursury to get our fruit trees and front yard goodies!  Yay!

March 25th, 2009 | Tags: berkeley, books, bookstores, friends, list, oakland, rattos, spring break | Category: life | Comments Off

It’s been a most triumphant spring break kind of day.  Got up early to go to the doctor… turns out I have twelve kinds of stress.  Or at least I have enough stress I’m failing to do anything with that I’ve racked up three stupid body things this quarter – migraines, heart palpitations, and a knot in my neck that feels like a tumor.  Anyway, doctor checked everything out, and he’s going to do some routine bloodwork, but otherwise I’ve been prescribed some chilling the hell out.  So… yeah.  Like I said yesterday, I guess I need to take this seriously.  That’s a really difficult thing to get ones mind around – seriously needing to chill out.  It’s a lot easier to think you’ll get to chilling out at some point when all the important stuff is done, instead of the chilling out being part of the important stuff.

I’m making headway in that direction though.  I toured a gym today, and I think I’m feeling settled on joining.  It seems like a great place – a separate women’s workout room, classes are all free and are all drop-in, towel and locker service… they even put shampoo and conditioner in all the showers, have free towel service, don’t play any music, have the TVs all on mute, and give you two free sessions with a trainer.  The class schedule looks nice, the fees aren’t terrible, and there’s no contract.  The people in there today also seemed really reasonable – no crazy bodybuilders, no meat market feeling, and a surprising number of middle-aged folks and seniors… just the sort of folks I want!  Plus, it’s just a stone’s throw from the Center (where I have a class, and will be doing research at next quarter), thus not far from the house, and also could be made to be on the way to campus.  I don’t see how there’s a downside, other than general gym-phobia.  But if yoga classes and some regular working out-type exercise make me feel better, and maybe teach me to release some stress… it’s got to be worth it.  And maybe I’ll stop having panic attacks and migraines!  I’m pretty excited, if somewhat aprehensive.

So post gym and doctor today, we spent the whole day working in the front yard.  I put together a little master plan for what I want to do with the front garden, and we got a really great start today!  I spread out the whole pile of dirt that was left over from the palm tree stump’s removal.  We’ve been letting the pile decompose for a while hoping to make dirt out of palm fiber, and it was looking really nice when I got into it today.  So I flattened all that, and trimmed the front hedge, and helped Lewis remove some small tree things.  It’s amazing how much nicer it looks already!  Thursday is going to be our big nursury trip, I think, to get the plants and vines and whatnot we’d like to put in.  I’ll post pictures as soon as there’s something more than excitingly flat dirt.  I’m very excited!

March 24th, 2009 | Tags: doctor, garden, gym, stress | Category: life | Comments Off